i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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