So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
