I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
you win again, gameday.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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