I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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