there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
