brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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