I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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