I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize