I wanna passion pit in your ass
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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