I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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