the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize