You work out of a Hotel?
Farmville is her only friend.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
