I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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