Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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