Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
