there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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