Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I just found a bag of teeth...
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
