Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Randomize
