last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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