yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize