I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
