omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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