my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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