I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize