Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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