I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.