2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
