I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
