he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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