Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
