there was a trapeze. enough said
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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