32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
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