If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Randomize
