This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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