you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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