You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Randomize