oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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