i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
