dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
We had sex on a dog bed..
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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