i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
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