Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize