There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Blood and glitter go together right?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
