ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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