if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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