just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
