How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
