dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
