Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
You were trust falling into bushes
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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