I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
