Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
no you cant smoke seaweed
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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