oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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