his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt